By Deborah Ross – Sept 2007 – http://www.deborahrossministries.org/
“INTIMACY. Do you have Strong Holds,
Cold Love, OR Passionate Nudity?”
****Turn OFF Cell Phones!
1) Praise & Worship
2) Prayer
3) Have each woman introduce herself and tell what she considers to be a romantic evening.
4) READ – MARRIAGE PRAYER together
5) If this study has been a blessing to you, take up a love offering for DRM and The Remnant Women Ministries. Thank you for your prayer and support!
QUESTION: When your husband walks in the door from work do you…
1) Stop what you are doing. Then, give him a big hug and kiss and tell him you missed him!
2) Keep doing what you are doing and hope he comes to you with a big hug and kiss.
3) You do nothing. You expect nothing. He’s home. Now let’s do life.
4) You start giving him a list of things he needs to do. Or, you give him the bad report of bills overdue and the kids disobeying. You announce you are about to scream from the stress of the day.
INTIMACY with your husband starts with your WORDS!
Leader Reads: PROVERBS 18:19
Leader Reads: JAMES 3:1-12 (bridle your tongue)
“Little” critical words lead to WALLS (strong holds) in your mates mind. These “little” critical words also lead to WALLS (cold love) in your mate’s heart. This behavior repeated over time, is what leads to divorce. BE INTENTIONAL ABOUT USING KIND WORDS! Your words set the stage for EVERYTHING else that goes on in your marriage.
Leader Reads: GENESIS 2:21-25
*Woman’s position is at her man’s side.
*The wife is bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh.
*The two are ONE FLESH.
*They are not ashamed to be naked (spiritually and physically) before each other.
More than anything else, your man desires for YOU to be sexually fulfilled. A man shows love through his sexuality.
Leader Reads: PROVERBS 5:15-20
*Cistern = reservoir, tank, container for storing or holding water / used in anatomy = a reservoir or receptacle of some natural fluid of the body
VS 16 – seems to be a sarcastic question or a sarcastic remark / The amplified Bible says: “Should your offspring be dispersed abroad as water brooks in the streets?”
VS 17 & 18 – seems to point toward men being responsible to raise their OWN CHILDREN – While God loves blended families and orphans (because He loves PEOPLE), this is not God’s PERFECT WILL. “Men” and “Women” should be responsible with their sexual desires and keep their intimacy with the “WIFE OF THEIR YOUTH”. This would also apply to the woman as keeping her desires toward the “HUSBAND OF HER YOUTH”. We are instructed to be “blessed with fidelity”.
VS 19 – “Loving Hind and Pleasant Roe” = amplified says (tender, gentle, attraction) – Let your breasts satisfy your husband, always. Ravish your love upon your husband.
VS 20 – amplified says = “Why should you, my son, be infatuated with a loose woman, embrace the bosom of another, and go astray?”
Lesson = Wives have a “responsibility” to keep their husbands from being tempted to sin (sexually). This is accomplished by being INTENTIONAL about being the one that SATISFIES his sexual thirst. Verses 21-23 speak of the consequences of men (or women) sinning sexually. While each person has their own responsibility to be obedient to the commands of the Lord (thou shalt not commit adultery), we should also be mindful of the innate drive that causes humans to desire physical contact. Just as we would not cause our brother to stumble with alcohol, we should not cause our husbands to stumble through sexual temptation.
Leader Reads: SONG OF SOLOMON 4:9-16
SISTER = SPOUSE / blood bond by God’s Covenant
Do you think of yourself as a “special garden” for your husband to eat pleasant fruits from?
Or, do you think of sex as a chore?
VS 16 – paraphrased amplified says = You have called me a garden. I pray the winds blow upon my garden so my spices flow out in abundance for you, whom my soul delights. Let my beloved come to his garden to eat its choicest fruits.
Leader Reads: SONG OF SOLOMON 8:6-7
Love is powerful. Agape love is unstoppable. Do you have a passionate, powerful, unstoppable love for your husband? If not, how should you pray to get back that “loving feeling” toward your mate?
Leader Reads: 1 CORINTHIANS 7:2-5
BENEVOLENCE = act of kindness; desire to do good to others; a gift given out of generosity (love making?)
*VS 4 = Your bodies are not your own.
*VS 5 = key word is “consent” = you both should AGREE if you abstain from love making for a short time to fast and pray / Don’t allow Satan to come between you because of lack of intimacy or because of COLD LOVE.
*INCONTINENCY = unable to restrain natural discharges; lack of moderation or control
*****In case we need to discuss this….FYI - (In verse 6 and verse 12, Paul says he is speaking this from his own opinion and not as the words of Jesus. Paul is giving sound advice for one to live in PEACE and not in torment or anxiety. This is why Paul says to let the unbelieving spouse go if they leave you because of your faith. VS 10-16)
Leader Reads: HEBREWS 13:4 (marriage bed undefiled)
*amplified bible = “Let marriage be held in honor (esteemed worthy, precious, of great price, and especially dear) in ALL things. And thus let the marriage bed be undefiled (kept undishonored); for God will judge and punish the unchaste (all guilty of sexual vice) and adulterous.”
*UNDEFILED = not made dirty; free of stain or blemish
Have you ever prayed OVER YOUR HUSBAND while anointing him with oil?
Consider praying Ephesians 6:14-17 over your husband while anointing each part of his body that you are speaking of.
The Lord desires that we intimately commune with Him as the bride of Christ. Our communion with our husbands during our love making is a natural picture of what God desire’s spiritually from each of us.
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Once you have completed this entire Bible study, ask youself the following questions below...
1) Do I need to get out of the way to allow my husband to be the head of our household?
2) Am I acting as the HEAD of our household?
3) Do I need to stop being my husband’s MOTHER / SPIRITUAL LEADER and turn him over to God to make him stand alone in his faith?
4) Is my husband LOST, SAVED or AN IMPOSTOR?
5) Am I LOST, SAVED, or AN IMPOSTOR?
6) What generational curses need to be broken in my blood line? My husbands?
7) What strong holds need to be pulled down in MY MIND so that the PURE power of God’s Word can work in my life?
8) Am I willing to lay my life down for the sake of my husband? My children?
9) What has challenged me the most through-out this Bible study
Be sure to write me and let me know how this study has ministered to you or your group.
With Love in Christ Jesus,
Deborah
Deborah Ross Ministries
P.O. Box 2186, Indian Trail, NC 28079
http://www.deborahrossministries.org/
http://www.deborahrossministries.blogspot.com/
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